I’m not a dancer.  I dance with the grace of an ox.  Not only that, I feel like a buffoon swaying back and forth and turning around in small circles and never really getting anywhere.  It makes me want to stop at the gas station and ask directions.  Now, I have to admit that I have only danced with my wife on a few occasions; so you might be justified in saying that I have never given dancing a try.  That’s fine, because this isn’t about dancing either.

  

This is about the love we express to our wives and husbands.  Our whole world is about relationships.  Everything that we do hinges on some type of relationship.  We build shallow relationships with the cashier at a gas station or party store.  We build working relationships with those at work.  We build relationships with our neighbors and fellow church goers.  However, the most important earthly relationship that we can cultivate is the relationship that we have with our spouse.  Deep at the core of our married relationship is love.

 

I’m not just talking about the gushy, gooey, mushy love.  I’m talking about real love.  Real love is the product of a true relationship with God.  If you go back for a moment to the days of creation you will notice that God created Adam and Eve (I’m good at pointing out the obvious).  Look for a moment at Adam, all alone in the garden and naming all the animals.  Here they come, two-by-two.  Every one of the animals had a companion to make them complete.  And here is Adam, standing there alone.  Here Adam turns to God and asks about his companion.  God smiled and put the man to sleep.  When Adam awoke, the woman of his dreams was standing in front of him.  Adam was so impressed with her beauty that he uttered the words, “Whoa, Man” and it has stuck ever since.  Adam had his companion.  It goes to prove that God created man with the intent of relationship – the first and most important being our relationship with God.

 

As man embraced the relationship with woman, the deepening of relating moves from twitterpation to deep and abiding love (for a definition of twitterpation, see the movie Bambi).  Here’s the problem.  After the fall, selfishness took over for innocence in the relationship.  In our world we see much of the results of living and loving selfishly.  Love becomes a conditional response to an approved activity or task performed for or to the person extending love.  It becomes love based on selfishness.  “I will love you, but what do I get out of the deal?”

 

Reality check!  Love is not conditional.  True love loves regardless of the return.  You don’t believe me?  Read the Gospels.  Read the account of Calvary and the tremendous sacrifice Jesus Christ made for you and me.  You don’t think Christ died on the Cross to improve His resume, do you?  No, Friends, Christ died on the Cross because of God’s great love for you (the person reading this) and for me (the person writing this).  Because you and I are sinners we will have a difficult time truly loving our respective spouses.  All too often we act out of selfish need and not true, unconditional love.  In order for us to love unconditionally a supernatural event must occur.  That event is the salvation of the fallen soul.  When the soul is redeemed by the blood of Jesus Christ, all the resources of heaven are at our disposal.  With all the heavenly resources we have it is possible for us to love without condition – to love past our hurts and our traumas and our demands of service.

 

True, unconditional love is an action that we must take, drawing at every moment on the Lover of our souls.  It is a daily, hourly dependence on God to love the object of our affection with true love through us.  For the husband to love his wife it requires the love of God in him and through him.  For a wife to love her husband it requires the love of God in her and through her.  Anything less than God’s love flowing through us and enabling us to love the other person is exhausting and short lived.  We will most likely fail to love like we are required to love if we attempt to love on our own.  To love properly, we must be completely dependent on God.  There is no other way to love with true love.

 

Lord, teach me to love.  Let the love of my God embrace me completely, enveloping me in the warmth and strength of Your true love.  Let me be the channel of Your love to those around me.  Help me to love my wife and my children with true, godly love.  Help me always to look to the example of the Cross in expressing selfless love.  May Your name be forever glorified through what You accomplish in me.

Amen.

mrc